No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
I know i'm drunk when the "men" sign on the bathroom sounds chinese
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
There's no way I'm ready for marriage. I have too many pics of other guys' junk on my phone for an eternal commitment right now.
You told me to keep you from drinking, but we both know I'm not that kind of friend.
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
wow bdsm is so cute
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
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