it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
After skinny dipping in your pond, I think me and tequila have added a whole new dynamic to our relationship.
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
then she said she was half-a-virgin and that she would appreciate it if i would finish what her old booty call started
theres a wall by my room thats like, a prime fucking wall. before i move out SOMEBODY is gonna fuck me on that wall, goddamnit.
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams
Maybe I don't remember every single thing... I think there's a hi lighter treasure map drawn on my arm...
I just found it. I hope it leads to food.
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
It was like in the Christmas carol when the guy pulls his robe back and 2 small children appear... except this time it was a massive scrotum
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
I feel like my entire body is ashamed of me today
You're a god amongst men today
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