My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
I didn't know it was possible to make picking up dog shit look sexy.
She did the bend and snap...
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
I've been drinking vodka for the last 12 hours at the beach and can't see straight and have awesome hair.
LIFE IS #1 SOMETIMES
If I pissed all over some chicks bed I would probably apologize for getting so wasted, not putting out, and turning into a god damn R. Kelly Cinderella... Not ask for coffee and a ride home.
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
Like a gentleman I waited until you were done vomming to start my Big Mac.
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
You're a FUCKING ASSHOLE. Love mom
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