Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
A 40 year old man just put his hands on my thighs and said in these exact words "you're so beautiful and gorgeous and innocent. But life sucks and you'll probably turn into a whore."
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
We hotboxed his closet and accidentally lit some of his shirts on fire... do we have a fire extinguisher?
He was super stoned and then he compared doing meth to having anal sex and told me to "ride that cowboy." The cowboy being my ex.
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
just caught myself putting beer in the oven and pizza in the fridge. i should be a trainwreck by tonight.
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