Nicole vs. Life
dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
I am so fucking pissed, there are no Shamwows in the As Seen on TV Store.
Looks like you'll have to stick to jizzing in socks.
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
She asked for references to decide whether she wanted to have sex with me. And she was serious.
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
I want to eat a stick of butter
Did your pain meds kick in?
It tastes nice
Well, I guess my plans of staying around the apartment and drinking my weight in boxed wine are ruined. I have a date tonight.
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
Nobody cheats on THIS.
You started singing Baby Shark, screamed you have no idea how it goes, then somehow turned the beat into Bohemian Rhapsody
Randomize
