I really hope you get sexually violated by a pterodactyl tonight.
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
he just asked me to email him a handle of captain morgans...how sober do you think he is?
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
he said i give him, and i quote, "emotional blue balls"
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
Randomize
