Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
i just peed out my two story window using my cell phone as a flashlight . hope the neighbors didnt see
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
I need a horse. I don't think you can get a DUI on a living creature.
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
I get off at the next exit which doesn't have a shoulder, a guy is riding my ass so I cant stop. I think I got as much puke on his car as on mine.
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
Randomize
