i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
Professor took us out for drinks. She said if I ordered the 64oz "Call a Cab," she'd give me an A. I drank it in 5 minutes. A+?
I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...
He made a fake guest pass that was just a note card with "I'm here. Me." written in sharpie, and tried to convince the security guard it was real.
Your girlfriend is in jail- I've just never been able to use that in a sentence before. Thank you both!
I feel like our lives always have been and always will be a never ending drunken rampage full of pregnancy scares and lost brain cells
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
I swear you won't find cereal in your washer machine again.
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
Randomize
