I hate seeing commercials about babies when i'm high
Yeah, I don't like babies at all
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
Then you shook your fists at the sky and explained to us that losing a sneeze is like losing an orgasm
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
I'm mopping my WALLS now. And talking to my mop. I literally just told it "yeah I kno that dirt doesn't wanna come off but were gonna get aren't we?" This is some good snow!!! mini maid needs to give it to their maids. The world would be spotless!!!!
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
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