I am officially superior to you. I said "Go Go Gadget Dick" before I fucked her. I dare you to beat that.
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
No, not at all. Pulling a condom out of your vag at 2pm is NOTHING like finding $10 in your winter coat. Stop trying to make me feel better.
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
I think I just shit out all my problems.
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize
