wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
drunk pissing on my closed toilet lid is actually quite a sobering experience
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
I deleted his number so I had to go into my old voicemails which are saved through my gmail and search his name... Never underestimate the resourcefulness of a drunk girl on a mission for dick
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
If I come in tomorrow with a cane and a seeing eye dog it's because I just mixed up my salicylic acid acne stuff with my eye makeup remover
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
Is this like a preordered booty call?
I didn't realize how hungover I was until I fell asleep in my math lecture, and woke up I'm my history class. How is got there still remains a mystery...
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
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