so later when i'm crying over him remind me that he once called his penis "senor weeper"
You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
He stood me up and then his cat died. I feel like this is Gods way of saying he's on my side, even after the tequila fiasco.
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
Got a minor my first day of college from the bike police. I'm gonna like it here
How did I pull off convincing everyone that my name is Dad? Maybe they were just distracted by my boobs.
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
I was in line at Panera when I got the pic you sent to your coworker. I just showed your vag to a soccer mom. The vibrator was a nice touch.
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
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