i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
I totally give up. Optimus Prime just fell from the top of the Great Pyramid into the hypostyle hall at Karnak.
you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
Then I realized I was alone sitting on the bathroom floor brushing my teeth at 2am laughing to myself.
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
She called me her guardian angel after I picked her phone up from the river of pee coming from her front porch.
Still not sure if my open-bar-week-long-trip to Cuba is the best idea as a congratulations-for-my-sober-february-challenge. My liver might just explode and give up.
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
If if makes you feel any better, you're definitely the hottest guy I've ever friendzoned.
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
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