u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
Put the lady boner away. He's engaged. To my brother. No, life is not fair.
Randomize