I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
I want Samuel L. Jackson to stand beside me and narrate my morning shits.
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
He shit in the fireplace
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
Randomize
