Happy Easter!!!
I'm an idiot
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
I poured everyones drinks into the ice bucket and then stuck my face in it. Apparently I'm a greedy drunk.
You passed out while holding my hair during a blow job.. i think your gona have to earn back blow jobs
I feel like I shouldn't have to explain to you why giving your cat weed was a bad idea.
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
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