Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
i never realize how drunk i am until i start using people as human stripper poles
We just described beer as "big boy apple juice" to his 2 year old.
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
And then she said "welcome homeeeee!!!" As she got off. Best thing about being back from Afghanistan
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
Randomize
