you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
The shirt is mine, the pants are mine, the bra not so much
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
Postcard from jail please. Reserving a spot on my fridge.
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
Only in my life does a conversation about Hanukkah lead to sexting
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
This girl I interned with got engaged today and I'm just like over here taking plan B with my tacos and PBR.
Honestly cannot tell if I’m magical or really, really high.
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
Randomize
