Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
Hangover cure: shower, throw up again, sleep for 4 hours, eat salsa, brush teeth. Good to go.
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
Use "feeling words"
Yay
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
Chipotle farts are not good for seducing boys.
You spent twenty minutes waxing poetic about her ass and her thighs
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
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