420 ftw
The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
i told him to take shots to cure a hangover and he told me i was "walking the steppingstones to alcoholism"
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
I don't make the first move. Ever. Unless were playing monopoly cause that's my shit
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
Can you explain the plethora of sunflower seeds in the dryer?
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
It's either gonna be a cock in my mouth or a burger. You decide which.
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
highlight of my day: hitchhiking a ride with random locals. tried to make conversation, asked what they do. driver says "you clearly don't recognize me." turns out i have had sex with him and forgot.
You are officially qualified to graduate from college.
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
Randomize
