I think I left something in your back seat.... It was my integrity
people are starting to question the shark bite story
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
We had to coat check the pizza.
He drew a face on his balls with a sharpie. It was like giving head to a unicorn.
Hon, I found you crying into a bathrobe in the back of a closet with a broken shoerack.
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
I can't tell if my heart is fluttering because I love him... or if it's palpitating from all the coke.
Here’s how sick I am. I’m not hungry. I don’t want coffee. And I don’t want dick. So, you know it’s bad.
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
There’s a stripper dressed like a slutty pilgrim. Is that a thing?
Randomize
