i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
you know your drunk when 7 soccer players cant catch up to a tranny in high heels who just stole your wallet
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
Where'd you guys get the alcohol from?
Oh. Some homeless guy we picked up from I-70. He bought us $400 worth of alcohol in exchange for a shower.
...... wtf.
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
I'm on my "fiiiiirrrst" glass of wine- the quotes mean it's the last of the bottle- so I really need you to pick up your phone so we can talk about this
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
Just walked past the field playing Jesus music with a fanny pack full of condoms and beer. Happy Sunday.
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
I'm doing my drinking workout. 20 pushups for each beer I finish. I should write a fucking book
Randomize
