I found the orange juice, it was hiding in the vodka...trickster.
Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
instead of telling him i dont hook up with closet frat guys, i gave him his "straight' fraternity brothers number... pike house will be interesting tonight
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
literally the only thing you kept saying was "i wish i had a beer keg vending machine that accepted hugs as payment" and everytime you said it you rubbed the urn her grandmother's remains were in
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
I know that we've never been that tight but I want you to meet my cat before I move.
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
Randomize
