dude..why do i always have to pick up the kitty litter after you drink?
just caught grandpa beating off in the living room
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
I just found a list in your handwriting titled "Places I've Peed." The National Mall and 'under the second bridge after the bend in the road' are two of the tamer entries. I tip my hat.
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
Panties = found
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
I lysoled the money\n(631): wrong text lmao
Randomize
