remember when she hit me with her car by accident, well apparently it wasn't an accident.
He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
I hope you never procreate. Philly is already the ugliest city in the country.
What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
A. What the fuck are period panties? B. Don't ever wear them around me... or bears.
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
You should never be more than a quarter of a mile from a working toilet
Preach!
I just wrote a self loathing message to self, wrapped my credit card in it, put it in an envelope, sealed it with another hate messame, and put it in my lock box. So. That's where I'm at.
The neighbor just poured gasoline on his 2 brush fires and proceeded to shoot Roman candles at them 🤔
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