Your face is a jimmy john
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
I puked in the revolving door and had to sit down on the escalator. That hungover. It's safe to say people are judging me.
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
I'd love to sympathize with you but I'm drunk in a mansion
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
I have drunkenly angered a family of raccoons. Please send help immediately.
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