kristin has been a bad kristin
Every time we go downtown I ask myself why we live in Des Moines
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
Saw a guy in a chef outfit covered in mustard talking jiberish into his phone running across the skywalk.
The amount of my urine my roommate has consumed after I found out he's been eating my food almost offsets how angry I am
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
if drunk means calling me and asking to borrow the game of life at 2am then I think you were drunk
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
In my next life I better get to be a bird. Fuck flying. I'm gonna shit on your car. Every. Day.
i dont know whats worse..that i woke up in a gorilla suit or that its covered in peanut butter
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
So I just watched a seagul attack my boss and steal his food in the parking lot. Today might not be a bad day lmfao.
Randomize
