Apparently I masturbate in my sleep now.
just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
If you were awake I would probably ride my bike over, fuck you like a god, leave you in the wonders of life, and bike home
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
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