But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
do you find it slutty that the last person I had sex with is also the person who sings my ringtone ?
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
What are you doing St Patricks day? I'm banned from all work parties with open bar ever since the cinco de mayo party that I dumped a drink on my co-workers head and played air guitar on my boss' ankle cast.
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
He keeps asking the karaoke guy to play let it go from frozen so he can sing it in a falsetto
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
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