you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
Just transferred the sun chips from that obnoxious Eco-friendly bag into a zip lock. Fuck the environment, that bag is loud.
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
he told me he was watching a movie and he'd be over later and i asked how long. he said 8 inches give or take. you cease to amaze me with the guys you set me up with.
Hey. Whatever time u wake up let me know Ur alive. I need my vegas partner... I don't think they let u take corpses on a plane.
Sometimes you just need a break, and sometimes you also need to get stoned on these breaks. I sound like some kind of fucked up mr rogers when I say shit like that.
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
Pretty penis doesn't make up for awkward eye contact.
Randomize
