He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
its like my vagina has this homing beacon out to all the guys saying "come find me, i havent been shaved in weeks"
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
No I can't cure herpes. I'm an EMT, not Jesus.
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
I woke up and he used my makeup to write "hope you don't get pregnant" on my mirror before he left
I can't wet the bed. That was the old me. I'm grown
Oh my god
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
I managed to convince her that the egg yolks were actually orange juice and she fell for it
Randomize
