she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
I though she ruined it by crying, then I realized it wasn’t a tear, it was my great aim. It turned out to be beautiful.
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
There is nothing more embarrassing than your birth control alarm going off while in a meeting with your boss and they tell you to take it.
My bathing suit kept falling whenever I went under a wave and this kid caught on and kept checking them out so I told him nothing comes free $5 a boob
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
Access to a Target is paramount to my general happiness and self-worth.
Randomize
