you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
sweetheart all i remember is you throwing up and saying "i thought things would be better now that barack obama is president"
I just threw up in a patch of wild flowers on the side of the road. I never knew rock bottom was so beautiful.
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
I'm supposed to nail the old lady at 1:30 so I'll see you at 1:35ish.
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
Why did I wake up with a half-eaten burrito and a vaccuum cleaner in my bed? ...on top of me.
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
Randomize
