I fucked **** last night, don't tell mike
this is mike. we're done.
She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
You were dancing on the bar and fell off into the arms of the hot bartender. It was like a fairy tale, with more alcohol.
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
whole 5th of capt = waking up in the shower after 2 hours and the whole house asking why i'm STILL in a towel. and me having nothing to say
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