im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
I swear he shrunk like 2 inches. Remind me that drunk sex needs to remain drunk sex.
people at meijer look at you funny when you have 37 bottles of champagne in your cart.
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
I walked in on him fucking my best friend. I think we've reached the point of following each other on twitter.
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
Randomize
