look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
every time I see Anne Hathaway all I can think is "my cousin fucked a guy who fucked her" and it makes me proud.... so I want to say thank you for being that cousin.
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
You kept flirting with some guy while I was throwing up on the sidewalk, and I screamed YOU DON'T LIKE MEN
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
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