I'm drive I can fine osifer
Vegas for my brothers bachelor party. Just landed and I have a boner. I'm giggly and teary eyed I'm so excited.
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
i don't know what the guinness world record is for longest time eating nothing but skittles but i'm going on six days
I hope as the only other living being in this apartment you can explain to me why the toilet was full of cheerios this morning.
It's 3 am and my parents just came up the driveway in a limo. They didn't leave in a limo. I'm scared to even ask.
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
So... Really random... You know we only exist cause Dad misspelled 'perseverance', right?
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
Well, I'm hung over and my penis hurts - two signs of success
The lowest point of my life has been reached. I just drank half a jar of pasta sauce.
listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you
I was trying not to blow up your phone, but I'm so horny I think I might die
Randomize
