Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
i feel like words won't express my appreciation properly so at some point i'm just going to bring you pizza then go down on you for an hour. fair?
To drunk to make oatmeal. I'm pouring it into my mouth and gargling it with beer. Ive made maple brown sugar bud light
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
Thank god for makeup because it looks like someone took a shit on my face
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
I remember you fighting a small man for the last of the pizza. Was there a midget in my house last night?
I was just thinking about our drunk conversation about having sex with elephants the other night. Love you bud. Stay strong.
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
Randomize
