Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
She asked me why I was wearing a Batman Suit. Have I ever needed a reason to wear a Batman Suit?
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
we were hooking up and then he goes "you can touch my penis" and i laughed too hard to do anything. no second date.
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
I wasn't even hungover I was just mourning my dignity
You spilt a drink on my couch, then used my dog to mop it up... you called her a mop dog, repeatedly
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
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