She just sent me a txt where every word ended in "zzz", with about a hundred "!!!" and called herself "juicezzz". I need back up.
Just saw two guys having a lawn mower race, and their girlfriends cheering them on. Get me out of Tehachapi,
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
Accidentally searched up "pizza pasties" instead of "pizza pastries". I was not disappointed.
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
Randomize
