Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
I need a $60 an hour job, because I have a $50 an hour drinking habit.
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?
You said you didn't want to drink anymore so you started shooting vodka down the back of your throat using a syringe. Oh, and then you aimed it at my eye ball...vodka in the eye hurts btw.
Sharing a bathroom with a guy sucks. I always have to set an alarm for the middle of the night just so I can take a dump. Poop text btw
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
Dude, im sorry I had sex with that girl I was trying to hook you up with last night. Good news though she puts out
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
Is it bad that I'm using the photo I took for my fake ID as my linkedin profile pic?
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
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