omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
I told the DJ last night to play Third Eye Blind before 1:45 and just pointed at him as I walked away. He didn't do it and at 1:45 I just walked out pointing at him, without my friends
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
I just lifted up my shirt to scratch my stomach n a Dorito flew out of my pullover n it legit scared me when it hit me.
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
i spent most of my hangover doing the math to figure out the last of the alcohol would be metabolized from my system.
thank you pre-med degree.
You wouldn't eat with utensils. You insisted on making your own spoon out of a bendy straw and staples while singing "I'm a survivor" by Destiny's Child.
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
Randomize
