Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
My grandpa is talking about laundry and he asked if i could run a "small hot load." Wow. I had to leave the room.
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
apparently breaking a beer bottle and then throwing up in a urinal is a terrible way to pick up girls.
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
Just spent the equivalent of my life savings in the liquor store. This is going to be a good weekend
Be proud. You give fat lesbians everywhere shower-nozzle worthy material for weeks on end.
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
Listen, I booty called my boss last night from the company phone. I may need to brush up my resume.
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
I don't know who he was but he was covered up with a shower curtain and ate a whole bottle of tums
they told me that it was glow in the dark and would make me magical. I was too drunk to say no. I woke up to a purple vagina.
its like a neon Im stupid as fuck sign
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