I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
He passed out while I was riding him, and just when I was about to call it quits he opens his eyes and squeezes my boobs and goes Honk! Honk!
someday when you wake up in a dumpster we'll have to have this conversation again...
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
Why do I have the 4 of hearts in my bra?
Haha we got sick of drinking on 4 is for whores so we stole the cards...I woke up with three of them in mine
drunken problem solving at its finest
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
Jesus fuck that was emotional whiplash
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
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