I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
Thanks for FaceTime'ing with that ugly chick last night while me and her friend were in the other room. it's good to know I can still count on my wingman even when we're 2000 miles apart
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
I am going to wait until he wakes up to set his couch on fire and then pee it out. That way he knows it was not an accident.
So I had sex with a hook nosed, lisping masadonian last night.
Glad that degree in literature is paying off. Nice adjectives. Maybe set the bar a little higher though?
my vagina is like this close to growling at me and leading me onto the nearest dance floor
make it buy you a drink first
Sometimes in life you just have to realize the security deposit isn't worth it.
Randomize