He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
Who ate shrimp cocktail in my bathroom last night?
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
I poured everyones drinks into the ice bucket and then stuck my face in it. Apparently I'm a greedy drunk.
This day sucks. I just wanna play ostrich and bury my head in your boobs.
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
Glad I can drunkenly remember to not get tomatoes on my Mexican pizza but can't tell a guy to keep his hands off my ass
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
I'm not dealing with this wiskey dick shit, 2016 is the year of hard dicks
So the door man at the local dispensary started giving me motivational talks about my beard...
Oh man I missed being single! Two different guys just sent me dick pics during my kid’s little league game.
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
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