Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
I just want you to know that if I ever had to fight man eating flowers or flying turtles to save my friends they'd be fucked. No one's worth all that bullshit. PS I really need to stop playing Wii while drunk.
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
I have six drafts of messages to you that just say "blood" and I have no idea where they came from.
She seriously pointed at the couch and asked me if she could "ride the talking giraffe". I'll never serve everclear again.
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
I accidentally sent him a snapchat of my boobs and now we're going on a date tomorrow... Could be worse.
You know that feeling when you wake up and your whole body just smells like a penis?
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
Randomize
