hell yes lets make some ravioli
dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
I hope you dream of an avalanche of penises
I think I've just evolved into some kind of vodka fueled monster
She flashed them and they let her pay with Monopoly money. I'm married, so it is your obligation as my best man to repeatedly fuck her for me
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
Randomize
