Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
Things you owe me: a sober apology, $12, the removal of bbq sauce from my doorknob
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
Randomize
