You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
I never thought the most recent texts on my phone would be with ASAP ferg and my ex...
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
I saw a penis covered in glitter tonight.
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
Oh, do you remember telling everyone you were with that your vagina was angry last night?
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