This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
im downtown. alone. lost. drunk. dressed as santa. dont find me. i just heard someone say mechanical bull.
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
You won’t make it to November. A 21st bday and Halloween in the same night has shitshow/ jail written all over it. So I call dibs on that tall guy
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
You kept showing the cop the bruises on the bottoms of your feet and claiming you were a medical mystery.
Some people say 6pm is too early to get drunk. To them I say this dinner is delicious.
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
This has to be the weirdest conversation I've ever had sober and in the middle of the day before.
I never realized how you can accidentally go home with someone until tequila got involved.
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
Why were you doing tequila shots out of Boston Pizza dip containers?
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
Randomize