dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
His pick-up line from last night: "I bet you cant climb these stairs right now." Needless to say.. it worked.
No subtext here. People are naked.
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
I'm drinking Leinenkugel through a Red Vine. I'm not drunk. I'm just happy with my life so far.
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help.
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
My dad is so drunk he attempted to ride my two year old cousin's tricycle. For a solid five minutes.
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
Also, did you really start discussing the weather in the middle of telling you my sexual fantasy about you?
We've been staking out a taco bell for 2 hours trying to find last night's one night stand
Randomize